Tressa Jayne Turner, Grandville Iowa’s own little “Calamity,” heads for the Grand Canyon State — and a wedding! No, not her own. Unfortunately, it’s her goofy granny gettin’ hitched, and the trip has more strings attached than a dream catcher. Her cousin’s keeping secrets, Rick’s sending signals — more of the smokin’ than smoke variety — and it seems Tressa’s not the only person with an attachment to “Kookamunga,” the butt-ugly fertility figurine she picks up at a roadside stand as a wedding gift. This wacky wedding’s about to become a southwestern scavenger hunt, an amazing race cum Da Vinci Code–intrigue. It’ll be a vision quest to make Thelma and Louise’s southwestern spree seem like amateur night at the OK Corral. May the best spirit guide win.